Supporting somebody without knowing their diagnosis

The situation

Someone in your team is capable and struggling. Deadlines slip, meetings go badly, or a task that looks simple keeps going wrong. You have a suspicion about why. You may even be right. What you must not do is act on the suspicion.

Managers are not diagnosticians, and trying to be one is bad for everyone. It puts the manager in a position they are not qualified for, it puts the employee in a position they did not ask for, and it makes the conversation about a label rather than about the work.

Start with the need, not the reason

You do not need a reason to respond to a need. If someone is missing deadlines, the need is a better way of managing deadlines. If instructions keep getting lost, the need is written instructions. If the open-plan office is making focused work impossible, the need is somewhere quieter. Every one of those responses is available to you today, with no diagnosis, no disclosure and no HR process.

The question to ask is: “What would make this easier?” Then listen, and act on what you hear.

Make it normal to talk about how people work

The best protection against awkward, one-off conversations is a team where everyone talks about how they work best. Ask everyone, not just the person you are worried about, how they like to receive instructions, what kind of environment helps them focus, how they prefer feedback, and what gets in their way. Write it down. Use it. When it is normal to have those conversations, nobody is singled out.

Do not fish for a diagnosis

Do not ask whether someone has ADHD, is autistic, is dyslexic, or “has anything going on”. Do not suggest they get assessed. Do not tell them you think they might be neurodivergent. A diagnosis is personal medical information. Under UK data protection law, information about health is special category data with extra protection, and prompting someone to reveal it is not your role.

If someone chooses to tell you, that is their decision. If they do not, the support you offer should be exactly the same.

Keep standards where they are

Supporting someone is not the same as expecting less. Be clear about what the job requires. Then be flexible about how it gets done. A capable person who is struggling usually wants to meet the standard; what they need is a different route to it.

What should you never assume?

• That you know what is going on for someone.
• That a person who has not disclosed anything has nothing to disclose, or vice versa.
• That support has to wait for a form, a diagnosis or a process.
• That someone who is struggling in one area is struggling in all of them.

What can managers do?

Notice the need. Ask what would help. Make the change. Check it worked. Keep standards clear. If the need is significant, or the changes are bigger than you can authorise, involve HR, and be aware that if someone does tell you about a condition, the duty to consider reasonable adjustments under the Equality Act 2010 may apply. But the first steps never need to wait for any of that.